How to be a Heartbreaker
by custosCathedra
Summary: There was a lot more than just grounds for a friendship between Dirk and Jake. Neither of them would admit it at least. They were too boneheaded and set in their ways to do so. Jake as always kept his emotions locked deep within himself and Dirk? Well Dirk was the type to wear his heart on his sleeve. Opposites attract right? Or do they?


**TW** : M/M content, Alcohol Use. 

**PAIRING(s)** : Dirk x Jake

 **SONG(s)** : suggested song(s) include...How to be a Heartbreaker by Marina and the Diamonds (the whole story's overall theme song each rule mentioned in it applying to each of the planned 4 chapters).

Jake wasn't one to wear his heart on his sleeve, he was pretty closed off. Not cold by any means, but simply he preferred to keep the true extent of his emotions under wraps. Sometimes he felt so fake when he forced himself to choke down his feelings and remain the cool, calm and collected charmer he portrayed himself as. Part of his charismatic exterior was very much real, the mannerisms and flirting were natural to him, but the hiding his sentiments towards those he really enjoyed being around felt foreign. It was all for the better he presumed, figuring that if anything it would stop him from getting hurt.

Dirk on the other hand was more responsive to the world around him. It didn't take as much to get him to go from being a "cool kid" to a complete sniveling mess. He was generally pretty monotonous, seeming only to waver when something personal had occurred. Other's troubles he stayed away from, but when his own came up he was confrontational and passionate, rarely leaving the other members of the event alone till whatever happened was resolved.

Needless to say they were each other's emotional counterpart. They were both too boneheaded to admit that they were though. It was only at a party hosted by Roxy that they had a mutual realization that there was more to their to and fro of bro puns and finger guns.

Her party was one of those college style house parties, alcohol was being supplied in red solo cups and there was music blaring, hell even a couple of people had a game of beer pong going. Dirk leaned against the wall that covered the side of the staircase, he felt safest at this mid-point between the back door and the front, also bonus points for him, the hallway was smaller so not many people decided to dwell around there. It had grown a bit tiresome as the night had worn on, many of the party goers at this point were hammered, making out wildly, or outside with a drunken Roxy playing some weird strip version of charades. He gave a sigh and downed the last bit of beer in his plastic cup, he turned to get more and bumped into something.

"Oh shit, sorry about that…," he tried to focus his vision to look at the man before him, it was Jake…in all his awkwardly shirtless glory, "Jake! Uh…you do realize, you're missing a shirt right?" Jake simply chuckled and gave a tipsy smile.

"Yep," he stated flatly, "Roxy pushed me to join that crazy game of strip charades, I said I'd take off one thing above the belt and then tap out," Dirk's gaze drifted to the other's toned bare chest. Okay, he was wrong…this was not as awkward as he made it out to be, actually it was kind of hot, "Can I help you?" he quirked a brow. Dirk wasn't necessarily going to pass up the opportunity to make an odd flirty joke.

"Yeah, if dealing with a raging bro-ner is your specialty then yes," he chuckled. Knowing Jake would probably give him the usual charming smile and eye roll. He did, but then he stepped forward…closing any distance between them in the small hallway.

"Heh, I don't know about that, but I can most definitely attempt to aid you with your 'bro-ner'", he air-quoted and his hands lazily drifted to Dirk's waist. Jake leaned in and whispered an inch away from his lips, "Do you like gin?"

"Yeah," that word sounded a lot more breathy than he had intended, "Why does it…," his words were silenced by a quick kiss.

"You'll see," he winked. God, fuck that tease. Before Jake could kiss him again he went for it, dropping the solo cup to the floor and wrapping his arms around Jake's neck. Dirk kissed him with a little more eagerness than English would have expected from the shorter male. Being caught off guard, Jake stumbled closer to him, his grip on the blonde's waist tightened as he returned the kiss. Jake swept his tongue over Dirk's lower lip, giving moment's notice before he slipped his tongue in his mouth.

Dirk quickly figured out why Jake had asked him if he liked gin. The taste of it filled his mouth as Jake's tongue brushed against his in a gentle stroke. He tensed, the sensation wasn't unwelcome, but it sent odd chills down his spine. Tentatively, Dirk began to move his tongue against English's hoping to elicit the same tingling sensation in him. Jake gave a breathy exhale and pulled away a bit, breaking their succession of drunken kisses.

"Did that do anything for your bro-ner?" there was a tinge of blush across Jake's cheeks as he bit his lip looking down into Dirk's eyes.

"Made it worse…," the blonde muttered in annoyance before Jake leaned in to whisper in Dirk's ear.

"My apologies, maybe I should use a more…direct approach," even when he was plastered his wit remained intact. One of Jake's hands strayed from Dirk's hips to caress the arousal rising in the Strider's jeans. His body went rigid for a split second at the abrupt touch of Jake's hand against his crotch before he relaxed and the breath he held in that moment of tension left him in an exhale. The brunette's fingers ran along the growing tent in the other's pants, prompting scattered breaths. Dirk dug his fingernails into Jake's shoulders.

"Dude, n-not here…," he came to his senses a bit as he attempted to push Jake back a bit to prevent him from taking it any further. His efforts were halted when the feeling of the other's palm against his hard-on was joined by smooth lips brushing from his collarbone to his ear.

"Well then, let's take this elsewhere," Jake's voice was low and alluring in his ear, "My car is parked outside…," he nipped Dirk's earlobe before leaning back to look him in the eyes, "What do you say?" the blonde hesitated a moment before giving a nod in agreement.

"Lead the way," he replied. Without delay, English stepped back and walked towards the front door, motioning for him to come along. Dirk followed him to his car, a green hummer with a couple skull and pistol decals on the back windshield. Instinctually, Dirk went to get in on the passenger side only to hear Jake chide him teasingly.

"Where do you think you're going?" Jake folded his arms across his chest with a smirk, "Front seat isn't very spacious you know…," he opened the door to the back seat, "Gives a bit more room don't you think?" If Dirk wasn't in such a state of mental disarray that comment might have actually brought about a snarky comment or two, he shut the passenger door with a hazed smile.

"What makes you think we're going to need so much space?" he said as he climbed inside. Jake came in after him and shut the door.

"I'm not sure, do you have any ideas?" he gave a devious grin as he leaned into Dirk to pepper his neck with kisses. Dirk's breath hitched and he raised a hand to run his fingers through Jake's hair, giving light tugs. As much as he enjoyed the feeling of Jake's lips on his neck, he craved the attention of his mouth elsewhere. The gentle tugs on the brunette's hair resulted in a barely audible moan from him, he knew Dirk wanted much more, "Tsk tsk, getting a bit impatient are we?" he murmured against Dirk's neck.

"S-shut up," goosebumps rose on his arms as he felt Jake's lips return to his neck once more, sloppily alternating his kisses with gentle bites. Dirk tilted his head to the side in embarrassment and desire for more of the taller boy's affections. Jake stopped for a moment only for Dirk to give an irritated exhale, "W-why did you stop?" his usually even toned voice a bit of a growl.

"Oh, I'm not stopping Dirk," English smirked at him and removed Dirk's shades setting them on the seat furthest from them in the back, he gazed into Dirk's eyes and maintained that gaze as he slid from the seat onto the floor in front of him, it was a bit cramped, "One moment…" he twisted around a bit to reach the slider for the passenger seat and slid it towards the front of the car, giving himself more room.

"Way to kill the mood," Dirk teased trying to keep at least somewhat of a front up, he had an idea of where Jake was going with this and the idea made a light flush rise to his cheeks.

"Not killing it at all apparently..," the brunette's gaze wandered to the bulge in Dirk's jeans and he grasped the blonde's thighs spreading his legs a bit so he could position himself between them. Jake leaned forward and gave a taunting lick against it from outside Dirk's pants. Dirk tensed a bit. English held back a drunken chuckle as he clumsily undid the button and zipper of the blonde's pants and pulled them down a bit along with his boxers, "Quite the problem we have here; I caused this?" Jake eyed Dirk's erection.

"Yes..," he was beginning to get annoyed with Jake's antics, "Are you going to just stare at it all night or wha-," Dirk's sentence was cut short as he felt the other male's hand grasp his member. Jake began to give his member strokes with an unsteady hand. The Strider boy let out a quiet moan, god that felt good. As Jake began to pick up the pace a little bit, Dirk's thoughts began to drift. Whereas he was pretty sober, Jake was…Jake was hammered and, oh god. Dirk jolted from his thoughts and tensed a bit, "Jake…stop." he tried to sound as authoritative as he could as Jake was rubbing his cock. Jake slowed a bit.

"Is something wrong Strider?" it was hard to tell if the concerned look on Jake's face was genuine or not as he gazed up into the blonde's eyes.

"Jake, just stop. You're drunk, I…," Dirk sighed and pressed a hand to his forehead, "Look, I like you, I just don't want this," he gestured to the both of them, "To be some hazy, morning-after memory," with that Jake released his grip on Dirk's member and sat back looking confused and a bit broken-spirited. There was a period of silence as Dirk simply pulled up his pants and leaned over the seat to grab his shades. He looked at Jake whose gaze was directed into his own lap, he felt his heart twinge a bit. Before he put on his shades he leaned forward in the seat and took a hand and tilted Jake's chin up to meet his eyes.

"D-dirk I…," English tried his best to form some sort of coherent sentence. Dirk simply shushed him and gave him a kiss on the corner of his mouth and as he exited the car he turned to Jake.

"Call me when you're sober."


End file.
